2013/06/24

What is parenting?

The most pleasant thing we could ever have in life after the marriage is kids. They are the apparent proof of couples’ love. They motive us to be more engaged, closer and loyal to our partners as the sense of responsibility and commitment in the relationship get more important and needed. Usually, the decision of having kids doesn't come to the couple's minds over a night; it takes time to make sure the relationship is serious and strong enough to move to the next higher level of mutual love, trust and loyalty.

Parents could never forget the extraordinary happy moments when they see, for the first time, their kids as cute little babies. We feel flooded with love and affections toward the new family member as well as toward the new mom/dad! These special moments should be well saved in our minds as most inspiring event to parents. These fantastic memories will give us the power and the reason to maintain love stronger inside family, and will let us know that the most important principle of parenting is love.


Parenting is unconditional love:
As we said, first moments of your parenting are massive emotions, warmth cuddles and kisses. That’s mean one thing: love is the natural basic principle of parenting. Therefore we should not stop showing love and providing our kids the affection that they can’t build their healthy personality without. Affection is the most central thing we could ever offer them besides teaching them virtues. Studies have shown that the most common causes of criminality go back to emotions disorder in the childhood.  We could conclude that affection gives the child the power, the reason, the motive or the deterrent to behave correctly as an upright and a moral person. making kids feeling that are loved, protected and that there is always someone around that take care about their affection needs.

Parenting is skills and techniques:
Thousands of books and sites will provide you with parenting skills and techniques, even in very detailed stuff. It’s good to read about it and choose the one that may work better for you. My point here is talking about good skills as necessity for good parenting.

All parents will find some difficulties in getting involved effectively in particular situations. So it’s vital to rectify and develop ourselves daily. One of the important things ـــthat lots of parents pass overـــ   is to look for successful parenting styles just around. Ask a successful father/mother about the reason their child is excellent in a talent or quality. You’re not supposed impose secondary skills on your child. First of all, you have, just to help him/her to develop necessary ones like communication and cooperation, decision making, autonomy. Afterward you could try to scan their aptitudes for any real tendencies and preferences you want to support.

Also, don't be angry or violent when you seem to be unable to handle a problem. It is essential to be flexible and a good communicator to make your style more effective and innovative.  

Parenting is responsibility:  
Being responsible of kids is the task you have to accomplish until they become adult and responsible of themselves. It’s the duty to provide a safe environment, healthy nutrition, clothing, furniture, medical treatment, schooling and teaching them all what prepares them for the adulthood life. Parents should expect troubles from kids and should realize that it may come moments you find your perseverance declining and even you feel parenting is boring and stressful. Although, the sense of responsibility have to stay high and we should understand from the beginning that parenting is being responsible and persevering.

Written by Abdo Hachimi

2011/08/30

children discipline

One of the parenting concerns and responsibility is to teach kids discipline. Is home appear a cluttered place or like a war zone when the children are out of control? With a little planning and a discipline structure, parents can work together as a team to bring peace to the home. Healthy or effective discipline don’t mean at all limiting your child freedom to express himself/herself and to be creative. 

Children begin often to learn about good and bad after their first 3 or 4 years. There are usually common values between parents that are coming from their own individual baggage from childhood. But it is very expected to have some difference or conflict in parenting style in some areas of child’s upbringing. Therefore, some cooperation may have to be made in order to present a coherent parenting style.


Set up the Rules 
Child misbehavior is impossible to prevent completely. Children, usually curious and endlessly creative, are likely to do things parents and other caregivers have not expected. As parents sharing the same concerns of co-parenting, you must find a time to sit down together and establish the house guidelines which could be constantly practical for the child. Use past incidents and experience of other successful parents to find solutions of problem behaviors of kids.  Try to take in consideration the child age and the balancing between his zone of freedom, independence and your limits.  

Set down with your child and talk to him/her about family rules
Tell him/her about the reason of setting a home system and the negative consequences of breaking it on the whole family and on himself/herself.  If your child has broken a low, you should remind them of the deal you have set together and try to give help to stop misbehaving by persuading, rewarding and motivating.  But if he/she continues misbehaving, you may relate the breaking of rules by an appropriate sanction consequence, but no physical treatment; family specialists agree that using physical force, threats and put-downs can interfere with a child's healthy development.